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Posts Tagged ‘football’

I heard an interesting analogy the other morning concerning all the whining from the left that Hillary won the popular vote and thus 1) should be President and/or 2) this delegitimizes Trumps victory and Presidency. This came from Newt Gingrich who seems about as tired of this as I am; and we’ve only got four more years of this incessant whining to go.

Having learned the new phrase “mansplaining” the other day, I wonder if this falls into that category. I suspect it does (though it’s not addressed to women, but rather leftist) 🙂

I’m paraphrasing and expounding on what Gingrich said here…

It doesn’t happen that often but every now and then a football team achieves more yards or forces more turnovers or achieves more of some other statistic BUT still loses the game. It seems that while they were concentrating on these things and having great success at it; the other team was more focused on scoring points. When the clock runs out the winner is pretty clear. Even the most die-hard fans of the losing team don’t whine, bitch, and throw hissy fits (too much). They don’t protest, or vandalize the stadium. They don’t insist that the NFL or the NCAA (college) change the rules to favor them in the future. And they don’t display the gall of insisting that their team be awarded the victory over technicalities. Nope… Hands are shuck, backs are slapped, analysis is done publicly and privately, some celebrate, some suck-it-up, and everybody looks forward to and begins preparation for the next game.

Hey, butter-cup… there’s a lesson to be learned here.

football-50-yard-line

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Sport - Soccer - UnderstaningHey! The World Cup is in progress! Somebody, yeah those guys are really doing something and winning, or at least tying, and running around a lot while not scoring, and then there’s those colored cards the refs hold up… and… and … And I’ve opted for the World Series of Paint Drying instead.

The most exciting part of a soccer game on TV is the gecko hocking car insurance. If there were truth in advertising, TV ads pitching the games would announce “Soccer! It’s better than a stick in the eye… but not by much.” And how one would survive a live game (without getting %$#-$#@ drunk) is beyond me.

Comic - 2014 06 11 - Tank McNamara - Soccer, Keep Away

Comic - 2014 06 11 - Tank McNamara - Soccer, Dollar Beer

About the only positive thing I can say about the sport is the athletes are in shape. It really takes stamina to run around for an hour and half occasionally throwing hissy fits and pretending to be hurt when another player passes within a foot of you.

Now for the rest of the story. Who would invent, much less embrace a game where scoring (let’s call that success) is practically unheard of? My guess would be people who aren’t accustomed to and thus don’t place much value on success (let’s call that scoring); which seems to be just about everybody else on the planet, that’s who.

The freakin’ game can end in a tie for %$#& sake… “Yeeeaaaaa! Everybody wins.” And then there are the fans, slack jawed cretans who beat each other senseless while trashing various venues the game is played in.

Thus, I submit, soccer is the perfect analogy of the current world order. A whole lot of running around by idiots (players and fans) with not much accomplished; driving those few of us who like to accomplish substantive things mad…. MAAADDD!

Soccer is absolute proof that we Americans are indeed exceptional and superior to the rest of the world. We have football (real football) and to a lesser extent basketball. We also have baseball which is slightly more exciting than soccer in that some scoring does actually occur in between the endless spitting and scratching on the field. Baseball (in its defense) would be more interesting to watch if they would “just throw the dam ball already…”

Comic - 2014 06 11 - Tank McNamara - Baseball, A Still Life

Comic - 2014 06 11 - Tank McNamara - Baseball, Pins and Needles

Where was I… Oh yeah, soccer.

Unfortunately, the media seems to be indicating that soccer is becoming more popular in the United States; which wouldn’t surprise me. Obama elected (TWICE), the economy endlessly circling the porcelain, government corruption and spying… soccer… all signs it’s all going to hell and pointing to a leftist conspiracy to undermine all that is decent and holy.

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